From Michelle Maloney - CASRA President

Referees often face a dilemma when coaches misbehave. Do we ignore their bad behavior or do we deal with it, and if so, how? If we ignore it, it will generally get louder and more frantic. If you ignore it, they will continue this pattern with other referees who may not be as able to deal with it as you are. Do us all a favor and deal with it now. And of course, there are good ways and bad ways to deal with the issue.

Think of it this way, as one of my very good friends, and mentors noted:

The field is like your living room, and you have invited people there for entertainment, and you are responsible for their safety and well being while they are in your home/on your field. You will treat your guests/players and coaches with respect and hospitality, and in return, expect that they will conduct themselves as they would in someone else's home. Do you ordinarily allow people to shout at you or call you names in your own home? I suspect not, and if they were so rude as to do so, you would invite them to leave promptly, if a warning about their behavior did not bring the appropriate behavioral result.

So, when a coach begins the shouting from the sideline about your calls, or those of your assistants, or the lack of calls, the way the calls are made or not made, or whether your choices on punishment meet their expectations or not, etc., you have two good choices. The first one involves a coach who is simply out of line, but not abusive.

What you must do then is:

1. Run over near the coach's touchline area, within 15 yards, and announce to the coach: "Coach, your conduct is dissent. If it continues, I will write you up." Then you immediately return to the game. There is no discussion, no choice on the coach's part.
2. The very next time the coach makes a statement that is dissent, do not hesitate. Run over to the same spot and announce: "Coach, you have been written up for dissent. If your conduct continues, I will dismiss you." And return immediately to the game.
3. If the coach is foolish enough to need another visit, you will say, again from the same spot: "Coach, you have been dismissed from this game. You have two minutes to vacate the premises, or I will terminate the game." Check your watch, call your AR's to you, and go to the center of the field and wait the two minutes. If he goes, find out who took his place, and restart the game, noting the incident on the game report. If he refuses to leave, gather your things and get out.
4. File a report within 48 hours.

The second one involves a coach who is being abusive, saying things like you are the worst referee, that's a ridiculous call, you need glasses, or things of this nature. What you must do then is:

1. Run over to the area near the coach, and invite him/her onto the field about five yards out from the touchline. If he refuses to come, instruct him/her that they have just demonstrated an unwillingness to obey the authority of the referee, and they are dismissed. State that they have two minutes to vacate the area or the game is terminated. Follow the procedure in #3 above.
2. If s/he will step onto the field, with your back to the touchline, standing next to but about 3 ft from the coach, tell them in a voice that can be heard by the fans/players: "Coach, this misconduct will stop now, or you will be dismissed." And go back to the game. Do not engage in a shouting match, a debate, a discussion with the coach. Make your statement, and get back to the game.
3. If the coach does not heed your warning, follow the steps in #3 above. Make sure to file the report within 48 hours.

I emphasize that there is no conversation with the coach at these times. You have made a statement of fact, and given a consequence. It is not up for debate or discussion. Simply follow through. Allowing coaches to continue to dissent, or worse, undermines the game as a whole, not just your personal authority on that field. You are not to be rude or disrespectful in any way. After all, you are the one with the power and authority here. Use it wisely, and the game as a whole, and the youth players we serve benefit.